Glass Half Full

Antonia's Perspective on Presence, Awakening and Healing

Chris Levens Episode 47

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In this weeks episode Chris Levens talks with Antonia.  
Have you ever wondered about the power of presence and the role it can play in healing? What if we told you that self-awareness is the key to unlocking your ultimate truth? Join us as we unravel these concepts in an inspiring conversation with Antonia, a registered holistic psychotherapist, Ayurvedic counselor, and yoga and meditation teacher. Antonia takes us through her transformational journey of self-exploration and spiritual awakening, sharing how she shifted her focus from trying to fix the world to personal growth.

Our enlightening discussion with Antonia unveils how she utilizes her broad range of expertise to assist her clients in seeing their deeply embedded stories. Antonia shares her insightful perspective on how our choices, the people we surround ourselves with, and even our identity can manifest from old pain stories. She shares her personal routines for maintaining mental health, and how she collaborates with a variety of professionals in her process. This episode is teeming with illuminating insights that encourage us to observe and understand the narratives within us.

We also touch upon Antonia's compelling book and the journey of writing it. Antonia illuminates the concept of dismantling and dimensional reality, emphasizing the importance of releasing stories of separation to gain greater access to a higher dimensional reality. We explore the practice of Ayurveda and its significance in achieving balance in life, and the healing power that the present moment holds. It's a deep dive into a profound understanding of self, separation, and higher reality. Tune in to this episode to uncover the power of presence and awakening, and how self-awareness can be a tool for healing and transformation.

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Chris Levens:

Good morning, good afternoon and good evening. Wherever you are in the world. Welcome to another episode of Glass Half Full, a podcast and a safe platform where we talk with a variety of teachers, entrepreneurs, spiritualists, uplifters, givers, shakers and serenaders. Everyone has a lesson to learn and a lesson to share. Let's use our life experiences to enrich someone's heart, mind, spirit and soul. Through sharing our experiences, we can be a learning inspiration for one another. I'm your host, chris Levens. Let's welcome today's guest. Today's guest is Antonia. Antonia is a registered holistic psychotherapist, ayurvedic counselor, yoga and meditation teacher and has been experiencing an accelerated awakening over the last 17 years, which consisted primarily of releasing pain and suffering at all levels and the awareness and expansion that has emerged from under the pain. She now shares this energy and the learnings that have come from this process with her clients and in her new book, dismantling the Third Dimension. Let's give a warm welcome to Antonia. Good morning, good morning, good morning.

Antonia:

Good morning Chris.

Chris Levens:

How are you today?

Antonia:

I'm very well this morning. Thank you for asking.

Chris Levens:

Well, we thank you for taking some time out to be a guest here. On Glass Half Full, we want to just feel like we say a good morning to you, because this morning, where you are, it's wonderful, thank you. Yes, can you tell everyone where you are in the world and what time it is?

Antonia:

Yep, I am just outside of Toronto and it's 9.03 am.

Chris Levens:

Nice. I hope it's a sunny day today.

Antonia:

You know we're getting much needed rain, so no complaints.

Chris Levens:

Okay, hey, we do need the rain as well as the sunshine, most definitely. All right, we're going to jump right on in. I like to ask all my guests this first question I believe that our lives are in spiritual design. Can you share your life layout or blueprint with everyone, how you grew up, where your family lifestyle?

Antonia:

Yeah, so in brief, I was actually born out west in the province of Alberta and I am the oldest of two girls. My mother left my father when we were infants and then she remarried. Now my biological father was adopted and then the man my father, the man my mother married then adopted us. So there seems to be this line of adoption coming through and then we moved all over. We lived all over Canada and even down in the States in Illinois, and then when I became a young adult, I went into university and I moved all over. So I seem to continue that particular family trend. What do you take from that, chris?

Chris Levens:

It does seem like there is some pattering happening, some pathology. Maybe that's happening From just from what I'm hearing, but I don't want to try to throw out anything too quick. We're just getting to know each other. But just by hearing that, and since you made the parallel touch on it, it seems like things are repeating themselves.

Antonia:

Hopefully it's going to stop now. Right, this is the whole. Point is to stop the pattern.

Chris Levens:

Yes, yes, this is it. This is it. We have to come in and interrupt them. We have to come in and interrupt them for that. So tell us now, what is it that you're doing today? What is it that you study? Did you go away to university? Do you have any developing education about certain areas?

Antonia:

So I first started out when I was very young. I was extremely compelled to fix the world. So I went right into international development studying women's health, got a graduate degree out East in that, worked down in Latin America for a while, continued to study, continued to go back to university, even went back to go get a PhD at the Institute of Medical Sciences up here. And then it was in 2006,.

Antonia:

all of that was turned on its head and I went from needing to fix the world to finally being able to go in and do my own work and feeling safe enough to look at myself and I understood through a lot of internal work in the 2000s that really I was trying to fix the world as a way of avoiding going in and really looking deeply at my own patterns, at my own pain, at my own ancestry.

Chris Levens:

And so that brought you to where. Where did this happen.

Antonia:

So I shifted into as soon as I felt able then to work with myself and see myself and work on myself. Then I moved from fixing the world to being able to sit one on one. So I had this dramatic shift in directions in 2006 with this awakening and immediately fell into moving over into counseling psychology. I went and got a graduate degree in counseling psychology. At the same time I was studying Ayurveda and came out quickly with a private practice working one on one with people.

Chris Levens:

Wow, yeah. So can you explain what does it mean to be awakened? You know a lot of people hear this and if you haven't gone through an experience, can you explain, like, what does it mean to be awakened?

Antonia:

Yeah, what does it mean? So I think the meaning of it for me was to understand that I am much more than what my mind tells me. I was much more, much bigger, and that there are many delusions, illusions, that our mind and our pain infrastructure tell us about who we are and what life is and what truth is, and what right and wrong is and what good and bad is. And when we wake up, we can see this infrastructure that we've been operating out of, which, I believe, is basically led by by ancient pain, and we start to see beyond that.

Chris Levens:

Wow, did you have help with this awakening? Was there someone I had?

Antonia:

no help. I had no help. I had no idea what was going on. It was extremely dramatic.

Antonia:

It was happening very quickly and because I was ensconced at that time in academia and traditional mainstream healthcare systems and political systems I was a political activist that there was zero community and zero reference, no reference point, no understanding of what was going on. So it was really quite frightening that I didn't know who to turn to, where to turn to, where to get an understanding. So I had to go through it primarily on my own. I had a few points of reference, but I was also very protected because there was this deep shame that was coming through that I had to look at, because if I turned to anybody that was in my current community and looked to them for validation, I was so certain that I would be shamed, that I would be rejected, that I would be called a crackpot.

Antonia:

So it was very isolating for me to come from that background and go through this dramatic opening and this shift in realities that I did not understand. But the beauty is, at the same time, that the awakening sort of you get delivered an understanding. So I was in this tension between this intellectual part of me that wanted evidence, that wanted to know, that wanted proof, that wanted, you know, not to move forward unless I was certain, and this other part of me that was so trying to crack open, to go, you know, to introduce a new reality, a bigger concepts of connection and love and trust, and they were really in tension with each other for years and to some degree they still are. I can just see the tension more now than I could at the time. So it was a very uncomfortable and extremely frightening time.

Chris Levens:

Oh my gosh. And so can I ask around how old are you at this point?

Antonia:

I was 36, 35.

Chris Levens:

Oh he's still a baby. Yeah, yeah, yeah, so I mean and let me ask you did you grow up with any type of religion at all? Did you guys like practice anything in your household or your family?

Antonia:

Oh, nothing at all. I mean, we had the traditional Christmas on one side and Hanukkah on the other. But it was not something for family to come together. It wasn't discussed in religious terms.

Chris Levens:

So you never went to a church or anything like that. Okay, Never.

Antonia:

It was never. We were all about. You know more of the secular political narrative around the kitchen table. That's what I grew up with.

Chris Levens:

Okay, wow.

Antonia:

Yeah.

Chris Levens:

Now it was a while I'm sorry, go ahead.

Antonia:

I said yes, no, it was a while.

Chris Levens:

Now? Are you close with your family currently? Has this changed or what you've gone through? Have they had a chance to you know? Have you had a chance to talk with them about what's happened, to see if they are interested to, as well as to want to change their you know things that are happening.

Antonia:

No, no, in fact, and you know, I had to let them go. And it's not yeah, yeah they're, we're estranged and yeah, I think it was sad and now it's, it's just one of those, it's just something that needed to happen.

Chris Levens:

How long ago is this? How many, how many years has it been that you've been estranged?

Antonia:

Oh, now it's been more or less 15 years.

Chris Levens:

Okay, it's been a bit of time Okay.

Antonia:

Yeah, yeah, they couldn't. I mean a lot of it is because I mean, I teach my clients the essence of boundaries and I do think that boundaries are fundamental on an awakening process, on a metaphysical process, because when we bring in boundaries, that's when we accept that we are creators of our reality and it says I'm going to bring this in and this I need to keep out. This is not part of my reality. And so, because my family was were not really open to negotiating new ways of communicating or new ways of having a relationship or understanding each other, that I needed to say no, I can't allow that level of anger or shaming in my reality. That's not my reality, and so I needed to step away from them.

Chris Levens:

Wow, yeah, that's a powerful thing, that's so powerful that you've done well, for sure, wow, okay. So tell us about your every day today with the people that you're working with. I mean, I'm sure it's like you can't tell all about it, but just give us some. What happens with a client if they come in? I'm sure there's a variety of things that they're coming in with. What is it that you are aiding them in? Why is it that they are coming to you? Yeah, thank you Great question oh thanks.

Antonia:

So you're right, they come in with lots of things and I have some clients who we actually just work in more of the mainstream alternative. So we work, you know, in the, you know work more on nutrition aspects and exercise, which is what Ayurveda is about is bringing the body into balance, to assist bringing the mind and the emotions into balance. There are others that that come to me to work more from the metaphysical and energetics. So in that group really, I bring to them deep seeing of the stories that we carry around in our body that are below awareness. So, as you were asking before, what is the awakening about? What does it mean? And when we awaken, we bring in awareness.

Antonia:

Oh, look at what I didn't even see before. That's pain. Now I see it's pain and now that I don't believe it, maybe I can let this go. I don't need to believe it, I don't need to follow it, I don't need to even understand it. So I just need to see that this is what I thought was truth before and actually it was just fear and shame and rage trying to tell me my reality, and now I can let it go.

Antonia:

So what I do is I bring clients into a state of seeing, so that they can see where the choices that they're making, the people that they bring in, the identity that they hold on to, how actually that can be a manifestation of an old pain story, so that this is actually shame telling you what to do.

Antonia:

And so when we can see that it's shame telling you what to do or usually fear telling you what to do when we start to see it versus believe the thoughts that are coming out of the fear, saying but I need to be in this marriage, but I need to hold on to this job even though they're treating me badly, but I need to have this addiction in order to feel safe, when we can see that it's fear telling you Versus leaving the thoughts, then the fear literally starts to dislodge from the body. You can feel it energetically, start to release and then all of the physical and emotional toxins that are in the body Connected to that fear start to go and then a little part of them wakes up to a truth. So that's what I do.

Chris Levens:

Wow. So how much of your energy are you giving? Are you wore out at the end of your day? Like you just fall into the seat when the last person Leaves out.

Antonia:

Because this is a lot, this is.

Chris Levens:

I mean because you're giving your energy. Like you, they're coming in and you are working with them for people who don't understand, like there is energy moving. So you know she, she is passing her energy, she's using her energy as well. So how tired are you like? Tell us about it. Or you feel like I'm good, you energized.

Antonia:

Oh no, chris, You're really perceptive Because it's true, because I'm still going through my process, which means there are, because since 2006, what I've been doing is releasing my suffering Constantly, all the time. That's what this body, an energy system, does, and I'm still releasing it all the time. So when I'm sitting in front of another person and they bring in their story, often it might activate in me something I'm not yet aware of, whether I'm conscious of it or not. Energetically, at a subconscious level, there might be something in me that goes Ah, you haven't seen this yet yourself. So yeah, we're all in it, and so really, my being is very much a part of Raising their vibration, is raising my vibration. Raising my vibration is raising their vibration. So we're all doing the work. So at the end of the day, I'm most grateful and I'm exhausted. Hmm, yes, yeah, this is it Wow.

Chris Levens:

So with all of that, how do you maintain good mental health? Do you have any daily routines? What do you do to take care thousands of routine. Okay, well, just share a few of them, a few of you, a few of the good ones.

Antonia:

Yeah, a few of the good ones well, you know it when you're, when you're in it, like like I, am in an intense process. So detoxing is so necessary, releasing old toxins that we've inherited from our ancestors, all that fear that we've been carrying on for Thousands of years. When that stuff starts to come out, it's a heavy process. So we really need to take care of ourselves. So I meditate at least an hour a day every day. I Exercise every single day. I Eat very clean food. I grow food in my backyard to make sure it's free of pesticides and oh, wow.

Antonia:

Up here in Canada we don't get a lot of fresh food, especially through the cold seasons, so we get a lot of fungus in our food. Okay, so you know we got to eat clean food. So I eat a lot of clean food. I don't drink alcohol, I don't eat sugar, I don't eat best food, so I stay very clean to make sure that I'm moving through the Stuff all of the time. Mmm. Yes. Whoo.

Chris Levens:

All right now. Yeah yeah, a lot of health providers.

Antonia:

I have osteopath, I'm yoga practitioners, massage therapists, all helping me all of the time. Yeah, wow.

Chris Levens:

And you know, it's nice that you say that, because sometimes people don't feel that you know the professionals are getting help and it's like, yeah, we're, everybody needs some help. You know, like you can't do everything by yourself or feeling that you can, so it's nice to hear that you're saying that, that you have the help of you know, a variety of other Specialists as well, coming together to make it happen. You know, and everybody, every part of it, plays a part, you know.

Antonia:

So I love that Great point. I think it's so fundamental because we don't I mean, we don't all have it all. That's why we're here learning On this in this lifetime, and so it's really fundamental to go oh, you over there, I think you have something to help me. Can you come in and I get that little vibration over here and that assistance here and that wisdom here, so that we can all Assist each other in lifting up to to higher, higher frequencies, higher vibration.

Chris Levens:

That's it. It's working together, you know, for because we're all coming from that one, it's just feeling that we are gonna share that Vibration and how that will magnify, you know. So that's so awesome. Yes, let me ask you we've been talking about the ancestral things what is ancestral trauma and what does it have to do with the proceeds of dismantling and a dimension?

Antonia:

Great question again. So good. So ancestral trauma we have been. We have been tormenting each other for thousands of years and More and more even in the mainstream research community through the study of intergenerational trauma and epigenetics we are, we are witnessing, seeing evidence that we hand down our pain Generation after generation after generation. So if we have been treating each other very badly for thousands of years, we are handing down in the bodies thousands of years of pain, suffering, discomfort, trauma.

Antonia:

I Think that we that is the sleep state we awaken. When we awaken, we start to see above these layers and layers of physical, emotional, mental and the and the Pain in our coding, in our DNA. We start to see above that, we start to see beyond that. So that is what I call. The third dimension is this very Constricted, dense pain state that we're in. That is very limited, and when we awaken we start to move beyond those limitations. So it is about releasing ourselves from that pain infrastructure and the wisdom that's trapped within the pain feeds, that expansion that rise above it. There is so much wisdom underneath that. Then, when we start to peel back the layers, release the layers of the third dimension, which is this ancient pain infrastructure, we release a whole new Beautiful reality that's kind of trapped underneath. We access that, we release that, we expand into that.

Chris Levens:

Hmm, so there's a growth. From what is what is coming out. We're getting some. There's a plus side To the releasing of it not just releasing it, but you it's you being left with a bit of education on what's happening. Yeah.

Antonia:

Yeah, I think. In fact, I think the learning is ten times the pain, which is why, when I come across some Whatever level of discomfort in my life, I'm like whoo-hoo, I can't wait to get to the other side of this, because on the other side of this is a bigger love, is A bigger wisdom, is a bigger truth.

Antonia:

I think that that's. I believe that that is what many of us are here to do is to use this discomfort and mine it through, learning from it for the wisdom. And because Pain is a contracted state, right, you can even see it in our bodies, the evidence of it at the physical level, but at all levels, that it's a contracted, limited, dense state. And when we bring the higher frequencies, the energies in there that release us, that open up that contracted state, within that we literally, at the all levels, expand and in the expansion we have the flow of wisdom, of consciousness, of truth, of love that starts to move through what was previously a really limited, contracted place. Hmm.

Chris Levens:

Wow, nice.

Antonia:

Making sense.

Chris Levens:

Yes, ma'am, I'm following, I'm following, and if people aren't, they can easily rewind it back in technology today and hear your words again. So, and then, or write it down, but, yes, it makes complete sense. It makes complete sense for me, definitely. Wow, that's awesome. That is awesome. What an exciting thing. Right For you to find, for yourself, to be able to, you know, or that you have been gifted, to have the awakening, the understanding, the awareness let's get let me get the vocabulary right that you have the awareness to be able to receive and to see you know, it's basically in the spiritual eye and to be able to see in a different way. And with that, you know, you're growing, you're opening up and I love that you're sharing it with other people because, you know, some people try to hold on to things for themselves and you know, we are really blessed when we give of ourself and we are giving to others, and that's when you know I always feel like when we teach is when you really learn. You know, that's when you really have the true experiences, so you're able to have these true.

Chris Levens:

Yeah, you don't know my mama. Yeah, I'm here, I'm here, you know, and so we were raised in this kind of thinking as kids, as family. This is how we have grown up in our family and it was a normal thing. But people would think that we were crazy sometimes if we would go to school and say certain stuff. So we didn't. But now, in this age, it's nice that people are having these awakenings, these aha moments. I think they're calling them now. You know, and it's awesome, you know that we can change and unbind ourselves from the things that we didn't even know that we were bound to.

Antonia:

Correct, that's awareness. Awareness is the ingredient. Sounds like you grew up in a beautiful family.

Chris Levens:

Oh, my mom did a great job and my grand, yeah, the women of my family, strong, strong black women they really they did their best and, yeah, I'm proud of that. And we was very, you know, we grew up in the church. My mom is a retired minister, you know, my uncle is a retired minister, so everybody, we grew up. That's why I asked about if you had gone up to to church, because the people at church would have been like you know, this is where we would have gone to be like hey, I'm feeling a little bit weird about this and this is what's happening to me, you know but where people wouldn't make you feel like you're crazy, because you know what people don't understand, they fear.

Antonia:

So exactly, yeah, but I even think that that can be part of the process, because I think we're moving out of feelings of aloneness and isolation and nobody understands me into where, connected you know, we are, seen, we are loved, and so that was even part of my process was to I had to extract myself from this, the essence of aloneness, of isolation, and move myself, know that I could move myself, I have the power to move myself into connection, and that's really part of it. So it sounds uncomfortable and yet I think that discomfort was so fundamental in me finding myself and finding the one, the unity, the whole that we are.

Chris Levens:

Yes, what does it mean to be dismantled? What is it that?

Antonia:

you are saying, yeah, that that's the awakening, that is the release of stories of separation. I'm alone, I'm not seeing.

Chris Levens:

Those are the layers.

Antonia:

That's the 3D, that's the pain. I think all pain at all levels, even physical pain, are all reflections of a part of us that feels abandoned, rejected alone. All of that shows up in our body as those contracted states, and we're releasing all of that mythology when we wake up, which I think more and more we're doing, and much greater numbers. It's quite beautiful.

Chris Levens:

What is it that you mean by dimension?

Antonia:

You know that's a great question. I'm not sure I have a really coherent answer, but I think it is the aspects, the varying aspects of a reality, and I think that a third dimensional reality we could say is limited by three varying characteristics or aspects, and I think that higher dimensions. Then, in bringing more aspects to that reality, we have access to more of what's going on in the greater truth.

Chris Levens:

Nicely put. I wanted to see what are you going to say with this, because we hear the word, but does everybody understand what it? You know what is it that you're meaning by it, as well as the meaning. So nice job, nice job.

Antonia:

Thank you, thank you.

Chris Levens:

You like, chris, it's early in the morning. You're asking all this, come on now. We thank you, we thank you, we thank you. So I want to change a little bit. I want to talk about your book. So why did you write a book? Is it something that you've always wanted to do? Who did you write it for? You know? Yes, tell us about it Great.

Antonia:

So I wrote the book. I never wanted to write a book and although it was seen there was an intuitive I came across in this Somebody tell me what's going on? Phase of all of this. And they said they said you're going to write a book and it's even in somebody who works with Vedic astrology. So I would you know, in the South Asia they have the Vedic astrology, it's a very specific type of astrology and they said you're supposed to be writing.

Antonia:

I was thinking everybody's crazy because I had no interest in writing a book. The project, a project like that, just seemed way too daunting. But I kept notes on on everything I'd gone through, from 2007, I think onwards, and it was about two years ago. I looked at, you know, the notes that I had done and even some video recordings I'd done, and I looked and went oh my word, there, there's a book here, there's actually a book here, and it just it became compulsive. You know this sort of organization of thoughts. I think I'd started a podcast. Somebody said you should be putting your thoughts in a podcast, and so there's. There's this coherence that came out of all of the stuff that I was learning on the other side of all of the discomfort, all the wisdoms that came out and that I was writing down. There was some coherence that came and and then it became this compulsive writing this. Almost I've got to get this out. I've got to get this out. It was manic and then came this book very rapidly.

Chris Levens:

Wow. And how many pages, how long is the book?

Antonia:

I think it's very big text and about 250 pages. Okay.

Antonia:

It's not. It's not extraordinarily long, yeah, and I'm told it's very easy to read. I've gotten amazing reviews. I'm so grateful to hear like people are really connecting to it and writing back that they're really falling in love with it. And you ask why did I do it? And that's really because that you know what I, what I went through. I felt so alone in this and because I came from that secular, academic world, I wanted to create something that would bridge others who were going you know, might be at this time that I think there's a lot of awakening happening that it might land in the laps of people who are feeling isolated and not sure what's happening and you know, are they fooling themselves? And is there anybody else like me? And I wanted to create a bridge for those into this, into this broader reality, into this, into this process that I think is really happening.

Chris Levens:

Well, it's another way of reaching people. You know, like everybody's not you know that type of person for the social media and using electronics, but you know books are. You know, for real. You know, my mom is a big book reader and she's using her iPad and so sometimes she's like I just want to turn the pages, like I want the book, like I want the paper.

Antonia:

You know so relationship, yeah, this is it? Yeah, sexuality Right yeah so that's awesome.

Chris Levens:

Do you think you'll write another?

Antonia:

Do you think this is the beginning of something, or I had three people saying I see another book coming out and I'm like go away I'm like are my in your business You're like.

Chris Levens:

Chris, actually we're about to release.

Antonia:

Not yet. Not yet, I mean there's supposed to be, but I'm not going to. I'm going to wait. If there's a click, it'll happen. It'll probably be sort of that frenetic, compulsive writing that will happen again.

Chris Levens:

Well, you know, I always say when it's meant to happen, it will happen. You know what has to be said. You know, and you're willing to say that you'll be used to say it, so it'll happen when it's supposed to happen. You know, as long as you're open to it and you feel like yes, then yeah, and it sounds like you're open to it. You know it's nice to have resources.

Antonia:

Yeah, I think it's to be open period and to see where your resistance is, so you can move that into flow. And so if it's going to come, it's going to come and I'm not going to. I'm going to try and keep my ego from fighting it.

Chris Levens:

Yes, and you know what Something the ego. Thank you for speaking on that. You know it's a, it's a strong thing, it has a, and sometimes we're caught into that. Yeah, sometimes we're caught into it, not even realizing that it has taken over, that it has. It has pushed its head up, you know. So, yeah, thank you for for even touching on that. So let me ask you who brings you back to reality when maybe you have gone too far away from it? Or who's that rock or that, that person you lean on?

Antonia:

I think you know it's so fascinating that when I'm rolling around and wrestling with something, usually that day or that week there'll be a client or two that will bring the same story into focus and I'll be able to see it better. Okay, I'll be able to see that with new eyes. So you know my clients reflect back at me what I'm supposed to be looking at and haven't yet been able to see. That's beautiful Okay.

Antonia:

Which all of us do, and if we're lucky enough to know that we bring our clients in and our people in our world is brought in to show us where we're stuck, then we can use that to our advantage. It's beautiful, really beautiful. I'm so grateful to my clients, so grateful.

Chris Levens:

Now are these people. Have you been working with them for a long time for years or is it like how long is it a client usually that you're working with, or how long is your longest oldest client?

Antonia:

Oh, good question. So I think I am 13 years, 14 years.

Chris Levens:

Okay, so did not just like us. A two year client Okay, we got some time, you know, just ask me okay. Oh, that's lovely. So they're like an extended point of family in a sense. If they are, you know, because just about the how you guys are sharing, you know like it's a little more personable for them, you know when we're dealing with.

Antonia:

They don't know. They don't know what I'm going through.

Chris Levens:

I don't tell them, oh okay, okay, okay, okay yeah, I thought it might have been in the book, okay.

Antonia:

Yeah, no, I don't. Yeah, I don't share any of my clients details on my clients don't know, but there is like they are aware of the process in general, not the individual details of it.

Chris Levens:

So you don't use your Okay, so you never use your testimony to empower them about what has happened. Do they know that you've ever had any trauma?

Antonia:

Yeah, I think yeah, most of them know that.

Chris Levens:

Okay.

Antonia:

Yeah, I just don't bring it into session.

Chris Levens:

Okay, I think, is what I'm saying. Okay, okay, that's understandable. A lot of them know that. Okay.

Antonia:

But not everybody. Not everybody is sort of walking this particular path, but those that are, then yeah, then you know we speak the same language or they're ready to hear the language. They're aware of my journey. A lot of them have been following me on my podcast. They read the book.

Chris Levens:

Cause this is it. If they're following you on social media, they would know about what is going on in your personal. Okay, so it's fine if they take that step. You know, cause you're already out on the social media network anyway.

Antonia:

Yeah, and yes, exactly, I mean, those that want to find me will be able to find me, but I kind of stay hidden from those that don't need to see that part of me, right? Like, not everybody, of course. Some people just need a good therapist to talk about how to fix the relationship with their sister.

Chris Levens:

It's true, and they don't want to know about cat dog meow, you're right, you're right.

Antonia:

Exactly, yeah. So those that are quote unquote meant to, because a lot of the clients, like they've been seeing me for years now without even, you know, I don't push anybody into a process, but energetically, their whole energy system, start to shift and change and they start to then release trauma and pain and ignite and activate this process in and of themselves. So I'm like that's why you came to me two years ago, because you needed to be here for this, we needed to activate this. So there's usually a reason, when they're hanging around for a while, that there's a process that we are creating, co-creating together and that's why they're there.

Chris Levens:

Nice, that's awesome.

Antonia:

Yeah, yes, wow.

Chris Levens:

I'm sure it must be, because you're seeing how they are growing and healing and, like you know, most of the time we don't get the chance to be a part of that process. You know.

Antonia:

Yeah.

Chris Levens:

So you're in a special place of you know healing for them. So that's yeah In that sense, wow, nice.

Antonia:

Witnessing rather than being part of it. Okay.

Chris Levens:

Witnessing, witnessing Look, thank you. Please fix my vocabulary about it. Yes, cause that's different. You know, witnessing and being a part of is that. That's a big difference.

Antonia:

So yeah, yeah, it's true, yeah.

Chris Levens:

Nice.

Antonia:

Yeah, beautiful.

Chris Levens:

Oh yeah, it is beautiful. It is beautiful. Yeah, the work that you do is it's powerful, powerful. Can I ask you, what's one question that everyone should ask themselves?

Antonia:

I think everyone should ask is this my stuff or theirs?

Chris Levens:

Ha, ha, ha, ha ha. I love it. I love it. Yes, ma'am, yes, I love it.

Antonia:

That is great, I'm so glad you get it. I'm so glad you get it because we confuse it right, we confuse yeah. We don't want to own our stuff or we have to take responsibility for somebody else's stuff. That's really not about me and I think we mush it up and confuse it and make it messier to get in there and really heal and evolve when we mush it all up.

Chris Levens:

Yeah, that is great. That's t-shirt worthy. Yeah, like that's good. Ha, ha, ha, ha ha. Right, that's t-shirt worthy. I would crack up if I saw that on someone's shirt. Oh hey, a few ideas for you, right, yeah?

Antonia:

Ha, ha ha, ha ha, very good, yeah, yeah, yeah, I would totally buy one If you put them out.

Chris Levens:

I would totally get one definitely.

Antonia:

I'm not making a ne-.

Chris Levens:

Ha, ha, ha ha ha, ha, ha, ha, ha ha, so tell us about what is alchemy awareness?

Antonia:

The alchemy of awareness. Yes, yeah, yes, you know it is seeing, the true power of seeing, of really acknowledging that, you know, if I'm uncomfortable, it's my fear that's taken over, versus believing the story they're a bad person or they're wrong, or it shouldn't be this way, but to see that it's my fear. So to be aware that there's an emotional root, that we have pain in there, to be aware of it starts to transform it in and of itself and I feel it constantly when I bring clients, as I said, into that. Activate that pure awareness. Ah, I see it. This is just fear. There's actually nothing happening, this is just fear. So that pure awareness creates transformation, creates expansion, just awareness.

Chris Levens:

Yeah, wow, nice. And which leads us to your podcast.

Antonia:

Yes.

Chris Levens:

Yes, so tell us about your podcast. Now I know you said about the book was this something that they were like we see a podcast for you and you're like, okay, or is this something you felt like you know what I really wanna? This is something that I wanna do.

Antonia:

Yeah, it actually came from a couple of clients who said you know, when I was talking to them or sharing something, they say you need to make a podcast, you need to put this on a podcast. And so I did. And the podcast just ended up being just reflections that I knew clients were really receiving, and so I put them into audio format and through the amount of podcasts and said here go listen to this, and I don't have to talk at you through session, you can go and absorb it that way. And that's what it turned into just reflections.

Chris Levens:

Yes, we love it, and it is really like I've listened to a few episodes. Really nice dismantling the third dimension. Just yes, the same as the book, the same title.

Antonia:

Same as the book.

Chris Levens:

So that I'm repeating both. But they're both separate things, but the same title, the same title.

Antonia:

Yeah, exactly which everyone can find.

Chris Levens:

Yes, the same place you're listening to this, you can find her podcast as well, dismantling the third dimension. All that information will be underneath the tab as well. So how has it been for doing the podcast, cause you're doing a lot? Yeah, I mean, it sounds like you're doing a lot, yeah, too much.

Antonia:

So yeah, it's that compulsive. Now that I'm in the book thing, I'm busy with trying to bring the book into awareness that yeah, there's a lot happening. It seems, as I said, it's in this compulsive process and I'm looking to slow it down a bit soon.

Chris Levens:

But Thank you for your honesty.

Antonia:

But the podcast is what's that?

Chris Levens:

I said thank you for your honesty on that. To say that you're doing a lot Like there's a lot going on right now, so and hey you know, I'm sorry, go ahead.

Antonia:

Oh, go ahead, Chris, sorry.

Chris Levens:

No, no, no, no, no please.

Antonia:

Yeah, I think you know it for me is antithetical to what I really want in all this busyness, to really where I think that potential lies, and potential lies in silence and quiet, in doing nothing. I love nothing. I love what emerges, I don't nothing. I love the awareness that comes when you sit still Right, which?

Chris Levens:

is why I need yes. This is it when you sit still?

Antonia:

Yes, yes, Ah, I love silent retreats, I love leading meditation, yoga retreats. I love them because the learning, the healing, the expansion comes when you sit still with something and be with it with acceptance. It's beautiful and so, yeah, this busyness is something that I'm hoping to shift out of shortly. It's a bit too much for me right now.

Chris Levens:

Yeah, and you know what I think that it's okay to say, to be honest, to be like, yes, it is too much. You know. I think that when people go the opposite way and don't say, then people feel like, oh, then they can add on something else, oh, they can, you know. So when you know enough is enough for yourself, that is it, because it's about self. You have to know when okay, let me pull back. You know, because what happens, we know, is the other way. People are getting sick, or things are happening, or there's all this stuff that's happening because they've overpushed themselves. So knowing when I'm doing too much for myself is the same. I'm able to just pull myself back like, okay, you know. So that awareness again, to know that, right, and we don't want to get too far on it.

Antonia:

So yeah, out of balance, or follow some pain story which says, but I have to be everything for everybody, or I have to be able to do it all or I'm not good enough and I have to prove I'm good enough. You know, those are the stories that were actually being driven by when we push ourselves out of balance, and so we need to see when we're out of balance so we could pull back and go. There's something in here that I need to bring awareness to.

Chris Levens:

Yes, indeed, I agree, I agree. So what would you say was the best advice that you were given, that you actually used? Hmm, I'm sure that you've gotten a lot of advice but.

Antonia:

Yeah, there's two. I think two core. One is practical and one was a reflection. So the reflection and I'm not sure if I was given or was co-created One is if it's not love, it's BS, it's not right, it's not real. And number two if I have to exercise a lot, a lot, a lot, I gotta move a lot, a lot, a lot. If you don't do it, it's gonna get very uncomfortable.

Chris Levens:

And I went okay, I'm moving a lot, a lot, a lot, I'm moving every day exercise every day, because if I didn't do that then I would be.

Antonia:

It would be really sticky and really uncomfortable. So those things probably keep me going every single day.

Chris Levens:

Oh, that's awesome. That's awesome and you are. Are you teaching yoga? Are you a yoga instructor or?

Antonia:

Yeah, so I am a certified yoga teacher, but I only bring the yoga in one-on-one with my clients to advise them on the kinds of yoga, the specific poses that would be good for them, what would work for them, what types of yoga would best suit them.

Chris Levens:

Okay, and we've been hearing this word, Ayurveda a few times mentioned. It was spoken about and I know people like what is this? Who is this or what is this? Can you explain?

Antonia:

Yeah, so Ayurveda is the oldest healthcare system in the world. It's been around for thousands of years. It comes out of the South Asia. There's a lot in Ayurveda, but some of the principles of Ayurveda is that we vu everything. To be healthy is to be in a state of balance, and everybody has a unique state of balance. So what is in balance for you is gonna look different than what is in balance for me, and that the wisdom of our planet through nature, through herbs, through air, through water, that those interventions we can bring, those into our lives to help us bring us into balance.

Antonia:

There's a lot of intelligence, natural intelligence, consciousness that is in our food and in our herbs and in our environment that we can access, that wisdom, that we can access in order to bring us in balance. So we could be out of balance, meaning I'm going too fast, my body's going too fast, my nervous system's going too fast. What do I need to bring in to slow me down? I'm running too hot, my metabolism's going too hot. I am getting ulcers, which is sort of a hot thing. What do I need to cool myself? I am not moving enough, I'm feeling sluggish, I'm getting depressed, so things are inert. What do I need to bring in to move me? And there's a lot of wisdom on our planet to help us move into those states of balance.

Chris Levens:

So that's kind of an understanding.

Antonia:

Is this by eating foods or herbs, or actually is it through a meditational thing, or so all of them actually Ayurvedic uses everything as an intervention, but one of its key interventions is diet. So a diet if you're gonna go see an Ayurvedic practitioner, they're gonna start recommending, for example, foods for you that will assist bringing you into greater states of health.

Chris Levens:

Okay, okay, nice. I've heard something similar to this, but I can't recall the name of it now that they do in India, but something a little along the lines of this, of something about dealing with the diet and nice, okay. And so how long have you been a part of this living this?

Antonia:

is really interesting. In 2007, I had my one and only sort of prophetic dream, a dream that talked to me, and in this dream it was in the morning there was a circle of women sitting in chairs, looking at each other, talking with each other, and I was standing outside and then one of the women with this long brown hair spun around in the chair and looked at me and said I Ayurveda. And I said what? And she said I Ayurveda, and I said okay, and then I woke up. It was about six o'clock in the morning and I started to cry and I didn't know why I was crying. It was like this emotional release, like something. Another weird thing was happening to me, which there was so much weirdness at that time, and I went over to the computer and I started, I put it in and I spelt it all wrong because I had never heard the word before and up popped the only Ayurvedic school in Canada, which was four subway stops away.

Chris Levens:

Oh, wow.

Antonia:

Yeah, and then it was there that I learned, because I had already been in this sort of strange process for a year, a year and a half that actually Ayurveda is the healthcare system to accompany, to assist somebody who's going through a spiritual emergence, awakening, a Kundalini awakening. That is the healthcare system to bring in the wisdom, to bring in the consciousness into your body, to help you move through. I had no idea I learned all this. So that was the dream. That and the last dream I've ever had. I'm waiting for somebody else to tell me what to do next and nobody will. But I had that. I was very grateful. It was I guess I was going way off course. Then he needed to give me some direct direction.

Chris Levens:

Oh, that's a direction right. That is a halt in the road right there it's like oh, okay, okay.

Antonia:

Exactly so clear and scary because I was walked in going am I crazy? Like, is this real? Like what am I doing? And I found a community from that healthcare perspective that got, in fact, my teacher. I went in and saying the last two years, all this crazy stuff's happening to me. And she says, oh dear, you're just going through a Kundalini awakening and I'm like, okay, what does that mean?

Chris Levens:

So I had a bit of an environment there. And this is it. You found people who understood what you were going through in a spiritual type way. That was like yeah, we get it, we understand.

Speaker 3:

And you felt like oh my gosh, I'm not crazy and like, help me you know.

Chris Levens:

Like what's going on here Exactly?

Antonia:

I still. They understood it more than I did. I was having releases crying in the middle of like they bring out a singing bowl or bring in a new oh yeah, you were breaking it.

Chris Levens:

I was like, yes, oh yes, yeah, that's so exciting for you, I love it.

Antonia:

It was. It was beautiful, it was truly beautiful. It was absolutely the way it's supposed to be. Yeah, it was lovely.

Chris Levens:

Thank you for breaking that down. So we understood about that and, yeah, people can now go and check it out as well. And where is it? You said Southeast Asia, because I'm in Japan. Where in Southeast Asia? Where is it located, do you know? Oh, south Asia.

Antonia:

I'm sorry. South Asia. So yeah it's from, originally from South India, but you know it's out of India. Okay, I believe, yeah.

Chris Levens:

Okay, nice, nice, nice, nice. I love it. I love it. Let me ask you so what does the present moment have to do with shifting dimensions? We've talked about things happening from the ancestral. We've talked about other things that are happening around. Tell us about the present moment.

Antonia:

So in present moment, when we sink all levels of our self just into now, then we're not sitting in story, we're not sitting in ancestral trauma, we're not sitting in these years and years of pain. When we bring our being into present moment, we allow the wisdom of consciousness and all that intelligence that's out there in that not so dense place Now we give it room to come in, because we're not all activated in these stories that are all about the past, we're not living all of the past and bringing it into our mind and our body. When we sink into present moment, we bring in the now, and in the now is perfect wisdom, perfect intelligence, perfect love. So that, I think, is the present moment is the ultimate medicine.

Chris Levens:

So, because it's in the present, we're able to actually deal with it and understand it in its real, in the true form. Is that what you're?

Antonia:

I mean, and I think that the longer we sit in presence, in the silence, the more we're able to see things, see the stories for what they are, versus being caught up in them and believing them, because when a story is spinning around in our mind, a judgment, then we believe it, we think it's true. When we get really quiet, then we start to see things for what they are. We really our whole beings start to get infused with that intelligence of awareness and that's what we activate and we can start to see things from that place of love, some from detachment, from some space, and that literally starts to rearrange our inner furniture and we then can let go of stories when we bring awareness to them. We go. I see you, I remember once being in an argument with my partner and I was calling him defensive, and then I went away on a silent retreat and about four days into the silent retreat I was in one of the meditations and suddenly it clicked.

Antonia:

It's not him being defensive, it's me, I'm the one who's being defensive. And it took that four days of sitting in that pure seeing, bringing in more awareness, bringing in that healing energy, for it to be safe enough and for me to be present enough for me to go. This is not about him, this is me me creating some idea.

Antonia:

So all of that presence that's not about the past, and all the stories of what we think is right and who we think we should be, and all the shame and the rage and the fear and all that is, when it's not there, we access our ultimate truth and from that, the more we bring that in, the more we can see the stories, the pain, the traumas that are trying to tell us what's real and actually is not.

Chris Levens:

Yes, Antonia, give it to us, give it to us. Yes, indeed yes indeed, I love it. I love it. Well, I like to close with this final question Is your glass half empty or half full?

Antonia:

Yeah, my glass is half full and rising here.

Chris Levens:

Yes, yes, we like a rise. We like a rise.

Antonia:

She's filling up. She's filling up.

Chris Levens:

Yes, yes, nice. Do you have any final thoughts for our listeners?

Antonia:

I guess you know for.

Chris Levens:

I mean you've shared a lot of great stuff, but I know, go ahead, give it to us, give it to us.

Antonia:

I'm glad yeah, I guess it would be. You know, if anybody who happens to come across this, who is going through a I don't know what's going on there's weird stuff happening to know you are not alone there is no such thing as alone. Keep going and you're gonna find your peoples. You're gonna find your connection.

Chris Levens:

We're here you're all here, oh love that.

Chris Levens:

Yes, we are here, we are here and in today's society, in today's times, there are ways to reach out. We have the social media, which before that wasn't it. You can get on, and there's lots of podcasts that people can listen to as well, as they can contact people as well and find coaches and things online people to be able to find resources and help as well. So definitely it's a new age that there are more tools that are accessible, so for people like you have helped to make, so thank you.

Antonia:

Yeah, it's a different era. There's all sorts of technologies of connection, so we are really fortunate right now.

Chris Levens:

It's true, right compared to the 70s and 80s, I mean, that's all I can talk about, but this is different. This is huge. So it's nice that people are more aware about what's going on. So, yes, thank you. We want you to continue to keep sharing and doing what you're doing. For sure We'll be continuing to look for you, for sure.

Antonia:

Oh, thank you, you know, right back at you.

Chris Levens:

Oh, thank you. Thank you. Can you tell everyone how they can reach you if they're interested to find out more about you or maybe even contact you for a session? Do you do online work as well?

Antonia:

Yep, I'm actually all online right now. Oh, OK, OK.

Chris Levens:

Because you know that's the new thing. Now, right, everybody can be all over the world and be like, hey, let's zoom in, or whatever.

Antonia:

So yes, please tell us.

Chris Levens:

How can we reach you?

Antonia:

So everything can be found on a website which is wwwtribe2collectivecom.

Chris Levens:

And that's all one word people and that's just the T-O, no double O T-O tribe2collectivecom It'll be listed as well. Thank you, Mary.

Antonia:

That's great. Yep tribe2collectivecom. Getting one-on-one sessions is difficult. There's a wait list right now.

Chris Levens:

Yes, wait list. I'm just kidding I'm just kidding.

Antonia:

Yes, I'd love to do more groups. Groups are better in many ways. We share our energy. So more and more I want to creating group works, which is meditations and teachings, and sharing each other's energy, finding beautiful ways of connecting through all the stories, through all the pain, healing the pain. So the group retreats is what I'm going to be doing more and more particularly, I think, down in Mexico. I'm looking for places down in southern Mexico to do more group work.

Chris Levens:

Excellent, excellent. So we'll be looking for you for sure. Thank you so much for taking some time out to be a guest here on Glass Half-Full. We're so happy that we had you in today.

Antonia:

Chris, it was so lovely connecting with you Truly. What a honor to be here.

Chris Levens:

Yes for you in the morning and you sound like you have a 12, 30 afternoon voice, so I'm impressed.

Antonia:

I'm up at five meditative here. Oh, ok, yes, remember that.

Chris Levens:

You sound like. I get it. My uncle is one of these as well. I get it. Ok, you've been up. I've been up, you've been awake and for sure.

Chris Levens:

Thank you again, have an awesome day. Yes, thank you again. Have an awesome, awesome day and we appreciate you. We'll talk to you soon. First thing Bye-bye and thank you to all our listeners Listening in to another episode of Glass Half-Full, a podcast and a safe platform for everyone to share their life experiences. Once again, I'm your host, chris Levens. Please subscribe, follow and rate this podcast on Apple Music and Spotify for more learning experiences. Until next time. No, you are blessed, see ya.